Generational Home

When I moved to the U.S. at three with my mom and brother, we didn’t have a lot of money so we moved in with my grandparents and aunts. It was a wonderful childhood being surrounded by so many family members. Over time, my brother and aunts pursued their independence. At that time, my mom had built a better life for us and bought a better home for me and my grandparents.

Growing up with a single mother who always provided for my grandparents taught me independence and to give back. I am so grateful for her and she continues to inspire me every day.At home, my grandpa shares his ideas on life and encourages me to see beauty in everything. My grandma isn’t as philosophical, but she always makes me laugh with her entertaining life stories.
Seeing them age has taught me the importance of supporting others through aging and health issues.

It has influenced me to try to bring light to dark situations. My family dynamic has taught me all family dynamics are valuable. What matters is love within the family. I feel blessed to have lived with different family members because they all taught me something different and shaped who I am today.

A Home Full of Love

While having such a large family may seem outlandish to some, for me it’s a normal part of my everyday life. Growing up I never realized that having a family this large wasn’t common. My dad has seven siblings, which means that I have over twenty four cousins on my dad’s side. 

I grew up with my mom, dad and two younger brothers my whole childhood. When I was 12, my parents got divorced. About a year later, my dad got remarried to my step mom, who has three kids, two girls, one boy, so in total there were eight of us all in one house. This past November, my half sister was born. Whenever I go to my dads, it’s a full house. 

My mom later got remarried to my step dad, who has two kids. I’ve never had a sister before, so I was very excited to find out that I was going to have three step sisters. 

Having this many family members can be very chaotic, but at the same time very entertaining. My family is usually the loudest in the crowd, and they are the best supporters I could ask for. 

However, a downside to having such a large family is that there are lots of activities. Therefore, not everyone will make it to your events. Everyone has soccer games, track meets, swim meets, dance recitals, musicals and more. But when they do show up, it is one of the most uplifting feelings in the world. 

Definition of Family

Growing up, people did not alway accept my family because it wasn’t the standard, but the family I have were always the people who made me feel loved. I have been close to Anthony and his sons ever since I met them when I was seven. As I got older, my relationship with my biological father grew sour, but I was never at a loss for a father figure. Anthony has raised me as his own for the majority of my life. Anthony has in every way become my dad and to me he is as much my dad as he would be if we were blood related.

Throughout my life, I have experienced people not understanding or agreeing with my family because it was different

. I’ve been told that Anthony is not my “real” father and his sons are not my “real” brothers. I’ve been told that my biological father is my dad and Anthony will never be that. Comments like those used to weigh on me greatly. I always wanted people to accept my family, but I have learned to look past those comments. Others do not need to understand or accept my family, I know who my family is and that is what matters.

After nearly a decade, my last name was finally legally changed to Anthony’s on March 25. It is nice to no longer be questioned why I have a different last name from my parents, but most importantly it felt like crossing the final hurdle to belonging in my family. It’s a reminder of the love I have for them and that no matter what people say they will always be my family.

The Gift of Adoption

Being adopted by my aunt and uncle has completely changed my life. My story has affected me in a variety of positive ways and has made me who I am today.

Until I was four years old, I lived in Los Angeles, California with my mom and dad. My life was extremely unhealthy and unstable. Each day, both of my parents gave their time and money to drugs, which left me neglected and our family with little to no money. A few weeks after my fourth birthday, it got to a point where my parents could not take care of me anymore and my dad ended up calling my aunt for help. After flying to Kansas City almost 12 years ago to stay with my aunt and uncle, I haven’t left since.

Ever since that day, my life has improved so much and now I see that it was all in God’s hands. On Dec. 3, 2023, my aunt and uncle officially adopted me. My adoption has been very beneficial in my life because it helps me feel more connected with my family. The relationship I have with my family hasn’t changed, but the labels we use to describe it have. Instead of being called their niece, I am their daughter.

I believe there is nothing negative about adoption; it is so helpful for children who want to feel a sense of belonging and importance in their families. Overall, being adopted has been the most special gift in my life.